EMPTY :: Thursday, May 20, 2010, 01:27
History has decide to repeat itself on me, as always. I know I have responsibility given that I have a gift but seriously I don't even know how to control it so how am I suppose to use it to help? I'm glad I picked my life back few years ago, it made me meet a lot of nice people, but lose some of them. I'm already very grateful for this life again because I've met someone special and I'm not demanding for more.
Losing a friend can be very painful. I lost one of my friend in sec 1. She was one of my best friend i make in sec 1, things happened, she quarreled with another friend and they broke their friendship. Seeing this, I tried my best to talk to individual and hope the friendship will patched back. I did it, but at the cost of losing both of them. It's very painful. I tried my best to help, and it worked but why did I get something bad? I don't want anything in return, I never help people wanting stuff in return but as I always help, I received shit. This just so hurting.
Talked to a friend a few days ago, we're all wondering why good people always receive the short end of the stick while the evil get what they want, isn't it unfair? We do good not to expect anything in return but we ended up receiving something and it's bad. Where's the justice?
I don't lie to comfort people because that's just as awful as insulting them. Some people I'll comfort a bit but I'll do all I can to help the person who is dearest to me. I have good friends, yet they too, receive the short end of the stick every time. I hate this, really hate it. It's painful..... very very painful. It tears my heart to see the person dearest to me suffer. It also pains me to see my friends suffer, but not as pain as the person who is dear to me.
One reason why I hesitated learning how to control and use it well is because I'm afraid. I see some of my kind seen horrible things and they either go insane or they developed phobias, serious one but it doesn't mean I won't try my best to help.
This time round, I've lost another close friend, same situation as before and now the same ending as before. It's so painful....... why I don't even have a chance like others, to patch the friendship back?I've lost almost everything, I hate my aunt for that. I only left you, and I've taken an oath that I'll love you and take care of you. I will do that. Now i finally understand the saying: "Because a man is never as strong as when he is fighting his last battle." Cos I'm currently fighting for my last.... I'll always love you yh. I will. I promise
It all ended in a teardrop. Empty
